Sleep meditation: How to use mindfulness to improve your sleep
I thought people were coming for me in the night.
One night, it was someone coming to steal my things. I got up, grabbed my laptop, iPhone, and headphones and hid them under my duvet. They were still there when I woke up in the morning.
On other nights, I woke up convinced that someone was coming to take something from me, or expose something about me.
Another time, I got up thinking that someone had set my bedroom wall on fire. It would often take a few seconds for me to slip back into reality.
Sounds scary, right? But I knew what was causing this recurring dream. Stress manifests itself in peculiar ways!
When stress sneaks up on you
I never realise I’m stressed until it’s too late. The first sign for me is usually heart palpitations – a fluttering sensation in the chest, or skipped beats.
Then it’s a shortness of breath. I start gasping for oxygen and yawning a lot. It’s horrible.
Finally, stress creeps into my sleep. And it was stress that was causing these distressing dreams.
This went on for about two weeks. What was causing my stress? I’m not exactly sure, but probably a combination of running my own business, being busy with work, and looking to buy a home.
Nothing too crazy, but enough to weigh on my subconscious.
The thing is, once stress starts disrupting your sleep it’s difficult to break the cycle. Poor sleep exacerbates stress and effects your ability to perform at work, at the gym, and in your relationships.
So I decided to try something new.
Sleep meditation: 5 steps to a mindful slumber
A lot of people choose to take sleep medication. I opted for sleep meditation.
Before you read any further, I just want to quickly say that I have had incredible, instant results since doing this. I know that sounds like a cheesy infomercial, but it’s true.
I had learned anapanasati meditation at a retreat in Thailand and had been practising it regularly during the day.
It doesn’t really matter what type of meditation you use. What matters is having a conscious practice to relax your mind and body. This is what I do…
Step 1. Sit upright on the bed
The reason it’s important to sit upright is that you will likely fall asleep too quickly if you’re laying down. It’s important to de-stress before sleep.
I generally sit cross-legged on two pillows with my legs covered by my duvet. Just do what’s comfortable for you.
Your legs can be straight, or tucked to the side. Also, turn the light out. It’s important that the room’s dark.
Step 2. Focus on your breath
I then start to take deep breaths. In the nose and out the mouth to begin with. I often force the out breath like I’m blowing all of the pent up energy out of my system.
I focus my mind on the breath following the air in and out. My breath is my point of concentration.
After about six deep breaths I settle into a calm, natural rhythm. At this point, the breath should be quieter and less forced. I’ve also changed to breathing in the nose and out the nose.
All the while your mind is focused on the rhythm of the breath.
Step 3. Settle your mind
Thoughts will continue to infiltrate your mind. Things that have happened during the day and worries about tomorrow will force their way in.
It’s common for the source of stress to attempt to regain some control in these moments.
This is the hardest part. But all I do is acknowledge the thought as it arises. I basically say, “Hey, I see you.” And then I let it go and return my focus to my breath.
This might happen over and over again. That’s OK. It’s normal. Just get into a habit of saying “hey” to your thoughts and returning to the breath.
That’s all meditation is. It’s not about emptying your mind of thoughts. It’s a continual process of thoughts arising and returning to the breath.
Step 4. Relax your body
After a few minutes of breathing I do what’s called a body scan. Basically you allow your mind to focus on different parts of your body, usually starting from your head and working your way down.
The purpose of this is to identify any areas where your stress is manifesting physically.
For me, I often feel tight behind the eyes and in the jaw, and also in the face.
As you scan over your body slowly, feel the areas where you’re carrying stress and consciously relax.
Loosen your jaw. Let your shoulders drop. If you’re frowning, try a subtle smile.
Then when you next exhale, let that stress you’re carrying out with the breath. Do this several times.
Breathe in, focussing on a specific area of your body, and then exhale and let the stress go and the body relax.
You should experience your whole body feeling looser, almost like a balloon deflating.
Then, return to your breath – in and out the nose. You might find your breath is now lighter and more relaxed as well.
Step 5. Guard your breath
This is a technique from anapanasati. It’s designed to increase your level of concentration on the breath.
It’s not necessary, but it’s what I do.
Now when you breathe in through your nose, focus on the sensation that the air creates in your nasal cavity.
Maybe you feel a cool sensation. Or you feel the pressure of the air entering your nose. Maybe it’s at the tip of your nose, or maybe it’s higher up.
Just notice the point where you feel the breath and focus intently on that feeling.
Then do the same when you exhale. Where do you feel the breath leave your body? Ideally it’s at the same point.
Now rather than just focusing on your breath, focus on that point in your nose where you feel the breath come in and go out.
This is called guarding the breath. Think of the first step as observing the breath. Guarding the breath is like keeping it safe where it enters and leaves your body.
If you can achieve this step, your level of concentration will be much higher. Your thoughts are more likely to melt away. And you’re also likely to feel much more relaxed and meditative.
I usually do this for about 10 minutes and then I slip down under my covers and fall asleep immediately.
Extra tips
Other things I have tried to implement on top of meditation are:
Reduce screen time
I quite often use Netflix or Youtube to “unwind” before going to sleep. This is a bad idea. It stimulates the mind and the blue light from computer and phone screens suppresses melatonin, a hormone that helps to regulate sleep. However, I’m not willing to give up my screen addiction completely. I either watch something in the lounge before going to bed. Or if I do watch something in bed I’ll make sure to read for 10-15 minutes afterwards. I also go to the effort of removing my laptop from the bedroom when I’m done with it.
Complete darkness
I try to make the room as dark as possible even if that means getting up when it’s cold to switch off the outside light. That’s also part of the reason why I take my laptop out of the room because it has a green light on it that sometimes flashes during the night. I find the darkness and the quiet of night really help me to go deeper with meditation.
Cool down
I know it’s tempting in winter to rug up in pyjamas and socks and an extra duvet. But this might not be helping you sleep. In fact, it could be detrimental to sleep. There’s science to back this up. Your body’s core temperature needs to drop in order to initiate good sleep. There is also evidence that lower temperatures promote the release of melatonin, which aids sleep. This is another reason why I do my meditation sitting upright with only my legs covered by a blanket. I don’t wear a top when I meditate, even if it’s cold, and this helps to lower my core temperature just before I drift off.
Sleep well, sweet dreams
I can honestly say that I experienced immediate and drastic results with sleep meditation. In fact, the very first night I did this I slept a full eight hours with no disturbances and woke up as though I had barely moved around. My duvet had hardly been disturbed. I felt well rested, alert, and so incredibly relieved because this had come after a few weeks of poor sleep, which is really unlike me.
Sleeping better has also helped me to cope with stress better. My heart palpitations and shortness of breath have gone. I really feel like I’ve unlocked a new level of sleep. I hope these tips help you to do the same.
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